Funny Out of Office Messages
We all have times when we are off for a few days from work and we want the email senders to be automatically notified of it. In outlook you can use Out of Office Assistant wizard for this purpose.
While searching for good funny out of office quotes, I stumbled across following set of hilarious messages. Some are offending but worth a try.
1- I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.
2- You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn’t have received anything at all.
3- Sorry to have missed you but I am at the doctors having my brain removed so that I may be promoted to management.
4- I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you send me until I return from vacation on 5/18. Please be patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
5- Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first ten words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
6- The e-mail server is unable to verify your server connection and is unable to deliver this message. Please restart your computer and try sending again. (The beauty of this one is that when you return, you can see how many in-duh-viduals did this over and over).
7- Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.
8- Please reply to this e-mail so I will know that you got this message.
9- I am on holiday. Your e-mail has been deleted.
10- Hi. I’m thinking about what you’ve just sent me. Please wait by your PC for my response.
11- Hi! I’m busy negotiating the salary for my new job. Don’t bother to leave me any messages.
12- I’ve run away to join a different circus.
13- AND, FINALLY, ABSOLUTELY THE BEST: I will be out of the office for the next 2 weeks for medical reasons. When I return, please refer to me as ‘Loretta’ instead of ‘Anthony’
I can see the smile on your face
If you have any other funny quote then share with me.
Uninstallation from C#
I wanted to programatically uninstall an application installed in my system. Following code is a working piece to uninstall any custom application from the system.
Note: Following code snippet is not the best example of good coding standards ! It was just a sample I was trying to use to achieve something. The code is a mixture of coding styles lifted across various sites. Please excuse for that
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 | private static int Uninstall() { Microsoft.Win32.RegistryKey Fregistry = Microsoft.Win32.Registry.LocalMachine.OpenSubKey("SOFTWARE") .OpenSubKey("Microsoft").OpenSubKey("Windows").OpenSubKey("CurrentVersion") .OpenSubKey("Installer").OpenSubKey("UserData") .OpenSubKey("S-1-5-18").OpenSubKey("Products"); string[] Names = Fregistry.GetSubKeyNames(); string uninstall = ""; string ApplicationName = "My Custom Application"; for (int i = 0; i < Names.Length; i++) { Microsoft.Win32.RegistryKey FTemp = Fregistry.OpenSubKey(Names[i]).OpenSubKey("InstallProperties"); if (FTemp == null) continue; string appFound = (FTemp.GetValue("DisplayName") == null) ? String.Empty : FTemp.GetValue("DisplayName").ToString(); if (!String.IsNullOrEmpty(appFound)) System.Diagnostics.Trace.WriteLine("Found Software: " + appFound); if (String.Compare(appFound, ApplicationName, true) == 0) { String installedVersion = FTemp.GetValue("DisplayVersion").ToString(); if (!installedVersion.StartsWith("3.1."))//can be removed if only one version is installed continue; object obj = FTemp.GetValue("UninstallString"); if (obj == null) uninstall = ""; else uninstall = obj.ToString(); i = Names.Length; } } if (String.IsNullOrEmpty(uninstall)) { return -1; } System.Console.WriteLine(uninstall); System.Diagnostics.Process FProcess = new System.Diagnostics.Process(); string temp = "/passive /x{" + uninstall.Split("/".ToCharArray())[1].Split("I{".ToCharArray())[2]; FProcess.StartInfo.FileName = uninstall.Split("/".ToCharArray())[0]; FProcess.StartInfo.Arguments = temp; FProcess.StartInfo.UseShellExecute = false; FProcess.Start(); FProcess.WaitForExit(); if (FProcess.ExitCode != 0) return -1; else { return 0; } } |
Excellent Programming Quotations
While looking for an appropriate signature quote I stumbled across this website. I really liked a few of the quotes.
- And the users exclaimed with a laugh and a taunt: "It's just what we asked
for but not what we want."- If the lessons of history teach us anything it is that nobody learns the lessons that history teaches us.
- The Six Phases of a Project:
* Enthusiasm
* Disillusionment
* Panic
* Search for the Guilty
* Punishment of the Innocent
* Praise for non-participants- Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work.
Practice is when something works, but you don't know why.
Programmers combine theory and practice:
Nothing works and they don't know why.- Learning is not compulsory. Neither is survival.
- Any code of your own that you haven't looked at for six or more months might as well have been written by someone else
- Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe
- Good programmers use their brains, but good guidelines save us having to
think out every case.
This is just a few of those which I liked from the entire list. Find time to visit the website and enjoy the quotes or to use them in your own email signatures.
Link: http://www.eskimo.com/~hottub/software/programming_quotes.html

